I went to my lovely Auntie`s funeral last week. It was a beautiful service for a beautiful lady 🙂
The service was held at the same Crematorium as we had my Mom`s last year, but in the smaller of the two chapels. What really struck me was, at the end of the service, when they were playing her chosen music, the Minister went over to my Auntie`s Son and whispered gently “take your time, just sit and listen to the music, give me a sign when you feel able to leave and I`ll lead you out”. It was lovely, respectful and thoughtful.
When my Mom was cremated last year, we were in the larger of the Chapels, I appreciate this Chapel was the busier of the two, because I remember at the end of the service as her music started, the Minister opened up the doors and motioned for us to lead the congregation out almost immediately. My step-father and sister started to walk out. I was obviously very emotional and distraught but even in this state, I felt a great sense of injustice. This was “her music” our final moments with her – and I felt cheated and rushed.
I stood my ground 🙂 and I believe, subconsciously, refused to move. The congregation stood behind me, not really knowing whether to walk out or stay, I physically couldn`t move until I had heard at least a little of her beloved Riverdance. She would have howled with laughter at my behaviour, but joking aside, even now, I do feel cheated of her “last moment”.
I appreciate there was another grieving family behind us, also waiting to say their goodbyes to their loved one, however, this was me – saying goodbye to mine xx